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Re-evaluating my goals.

My plan to speak at pendulum summit got derailed, for the past few months.

I set an audacious goal, and didn’t really know what I was getting myself in for.

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Just like all goals, plan A didn’t work also plan b, c,d, and e. But now finally after trailing and fail-learning and a bit of de-motivation, I am getting the picture back of what I wanted 9 months ago.

I can see myself speaking on stage and the energy in the place being off the charts. I know the type of energy I want, because I’ve was a DJ, and I know when a place is electric. 3 or 4 thousand people, with a real drive, to be the best that they can be. Just even saying this pumps me up.

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I got derailed like every one, my goal was going to take a lot more effort than I thought. But that is the mark of a real goal. Something that will grow you. I had all the pieces but had no idea how long and how to put them together.

My naive assumption at the start of the year was, I’d put out a bunch of videos and get traction, and that was it. Haha. So funny now. Totally delusional. But again that is the mark of a true goal.

So, I’ve melted my own head over, and over, just like every entrepreneur, and it didn’t seem as much fun, as it originally did. It started feeling like it was going to be a lot of hard work.

Hard work

My plan originally was to do a bit of online marketing, and get a job with Pendulum Summit doing marketing, network with all the top people, and develop an opportunity that way.

What has come about, is I’ve had to start a media company, to build my own brand, which still doesn’t exist. So I’ve had to do a lot of study, and growing, than originally planned.

I started a meet up group,(The Epic Life Group) because I needed experience as an actual speaker. Yea that’s how delusional, this goal was. I fucking love it. Totally nuts.

Because I got disillusioned by the scale of things, my energy started to go, and I realized, I had a lot less time, than I originally thought. I was aiming to have all my stuff together at the end of the year, and I’d get a place to speak. But thanks to DJ and Journalist, Mark Kavanagh, I realized I had a lot less time. I actually had to get my shit together months in advance, because that is when they would finalize the lineup. Yea as I said I was delusional. Haha

Time

So through setting up the Meet-up group, that became much more interesting, and of much more value, than speaking at pendulum summit. I was getting in a small way, what I was aiming for in speaking at Pendulum.

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I said to myself, sure if I just build this group to thousands of people, I wont need pendulum.

So I carried on with that vision for a few months and had to think about growing the group, so I started reading lots of books, and marketing stuff, primarily @garyvee and today I realized, that I was struggling with my marketing message.

I realized that I had no direction, for what I was doing, I lost my north star. My vision had evaporated.

I was reading this stuff to grow the group, but to what end. It was vague and mushy.

Lost vision

Over the past few months, I had felt this vagueness, but I had no idea what it was. I went from being proactive, to just reading stuff that seemed like being productive, but it wasn’t leading anywhere.

I am reminded again, and again, that we have to have a north star, a destination, a goal because, that puts what we are doing, now, in context, and gives what we are doing, now, purpose.

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I was proactively lost.

I can even see it in the epic life group, I had lost that drive to grow, by being vague, and the group, I feel,could feel that too. Every bit of content I was putting out was great, but it lacked that bit of drive, and conviction, that direction. What we are all doing this for. We want epic lives, that is why, we are here, and that energy, was faltering.

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I understand on a whole new level, the purpose of goals, so much more now. Goals are not to be attained, but they are there as tools to help you grow.

The goal itself is irrelevant, the journey is the most important thing. It is who you become as a result of your journey, that is most important. But! the goal gives you direction.

This goal has gone from being something fun, to something much more serious, it is now become a mark of my growth, as a man, a person, as a person who can make a difference, to his own life, and as a result the people around him.

The goal has gone from being a selfish one, to one that I hope will empower others.

Get over myself

I know now, that I am mad late, on speaking at pendulum, but miracles happen every day.

I am re-energized, and clear again on what I want to do, and why. We all go through these processes. If you are to take one thing away from this, is just keep going, keep moving forward, and things will become clear eventually.

Clear Vision Clear Reults

If  I had have stopped, I would not have a second chance now, and I gave myself that second chance.

Second chances

My energy and clarity is back.

I see myself in the Dublin Exhibition Center speaking to 3 thousand people, and bringing them on a journey that empowers the fuck out of them. I see the place going nuts, for themselves, because they will see how far, they have come, through my story.

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If I can be so delusional, and keep going, so can anyone. I can tell you now, I am 100% a better person for all the effort I have put in. Win, loose, or draw I have grown, and that is the real purpose of goals.

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I can not go back to who I was, and one way or another, I am going to have better things because of this.

I look forward to meeting you on our Epic Journey’s

 

Feel awesome2

The most important thing, you could ever do!

Setting your mentality for the day.

Imagine waking up, and the first thing you notice, is how tired you still feel. Like that 8 hours of sleep, has just been a waste of time. You have just fucked up your sleep and you already feel like a looser.

In bed tired.

I have done this way too much. Starting off my days in completely the most dis-empowering way possible.

I’m sure you have heard, what I am about to say already, and it’s probably made sense to you.

What I want to ask you, is why haven’t you done it? I want you to ask yourself, why you haven’t done it?

why

I don’t feel like it, it’s too hard when I’m tired, I don’t think of it. whatever your complaints are I’ve used them. I have gotten into looser mode first thing.

What it boiled down to for me is, I didn’t put me, as high enough priority in my life. I was a whinger and a moaner.

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I was going with the flow, wake up, and see what happens. No direction.

I knew all the right stuff, but wasn’t doing it, because, I just didn’t feel like it.

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I’d try it for a bit, and then let just let old ways win out.

Now, I want you to imagine, what it would be like, to feel awesome every day, grateful every day, and excited to see what happens?

All good things are the opposite side of effort. Even in the smallest way. You have to get up off your bum, to get an ice-cream from the fridge.

This is so important I’ll say it twice, “all good things are the opposite side of effort”.

So how can you expect to have a good day, if you don’t put any effort into it?

Hope is the most destructive thing, on this planet!

Hope gets you nothing! Effort gets you something!

What would happen if you put energy into your day? If you said, thank you, for a bed to lye, thank you, for the house that keeps me out of the wind. Be grateful for what ever you want.

Feel Awesome

Then you start creating how you want your day to go. I am going to meet this person and have an awesome time no matter what. We are going to have fun. I’m going to enjoy the drive to work today. What ever you want, you can choose how you want to feel about it.

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Imagine taking charge of yourself and your day!! How awesome would that be? I can I willImagine putting effort into how much fun your life is going to be, just because you decided to?

Take 1 minute now and do this. Say with a smile on your face, feel silly and put real energy into it. I feel fantastic, I feel fantastic, I feel fantastic, the rest of today is going to be awesome! just pay attention to how you feel, now?
Drive that energy now, this is literally the most important thing, you could do for your, whole life,    Feel_Awesome-606x230 right now. Take full charge, and have an awesome day! Choose to feel better, choose to have fun, choose to feel awesome, now! you are in charge!

It’s your choice!

Be the Change.

The Epic Life Group

I see opportunities every where.

Most of all I see opportunities, how this group will make the world a better place.

Be the Change.

Every day I see and hear people complaining on social media, but very few are doing anything. To be honest I’m sick of whingers.

Each and every one of us have opportunities, on a day to day basis to make the world a better place. Even if its just a smile.

Rather than complaining about what you don’t like, lets create and share things that we do like, and just maybe others will catch the buzz???

The Epic Life Group is all about creating that future, that we actually want, and to do that, we have to become more conscious about what we are doing, and saying.

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We have a group of people who want to create a better world, and that world starts at home, in your head, in your mind, and in your heart. If you are happier, it just makes sense, that you will automatically make the people around you happier. So what would happen if those people become happier too, wont they have the ripple effect, on their friends, also. Now that one person is actually making the whole world a better place, just by them being happy.

My fist attempt to capture water drops.

To get happy you have to be living your highest values, to learn that, you have to get out of what school, parents and society have taught you. You now will be thinking for yourself. No one to blame, but so much power to choose the life you want.

Take Charge

The greater vision for the Epic Life Group is to set up a fund. That fund will be a for profit company, that is focused on making the world a better place. It will be called The Dove Foundation and it will use current business practices, for the betterment of the world.

The Dove Foundation.

By making the dove foundation a for profit company, we will be able to grow it year on year, to have a bigger impact year on year. So the more we grow the greater effect we will have on making the world a better place.

A simple example of this is the orangutans and Sumatran tiger’s biggest problem is deforestation, so we use a % of our growth, to systematically buy up rain forest, year on year. This is one of the 3 main objectives of the dove foundations.

  1. Effective education,
  2. Empowering environmentally beneficial companies.
  3. Reforestation and regrowth of dead or dying habitat.

I believe these three things, will be the highest impact things, we as a group can do on the planet.

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Let’s be creators, and create the future of our dreams, by doing what we love, we create that ripple effect of happiness.

Already in the Epic Life Group, we are starting to see bonds happen between people, and business opportunities develop.

The EPIC LIFE GROUP

http://www.meetup.com/Epic-Life-Group/about/

Anthony Miller

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anthony@theepiclifegroup.com

 

 

FEAR

Loosing my mind with Fear

FearIf you imagine a dark alley what do you think of. Happiness or fear?

I’m guessing you thought of danger why is that? I’m sure in reality 99% of people walk through dark alleys and lane-ways without any incident what so ever. So why do we think of danger, when we say dark alley?

batman_alleyWas it because Batman’s parents were killed there? Is it because the caped crusader prowls them now haha.

Have you ever been actually mugged down a dark alley?

So what is it that has created this mentality about dark alleys being dangerous? That something MAY happen not will?

Its really interesting isn’t it?

familiarity-breeds-contempt-quote-1We can blame the media, but in reality its actually just a story, that movies and the media have perpetuated over the years.

So if it is just a story why do we feel it’s real?

If we walk down the same alley every day, does the feeling change, because your more familiar with it? Why is that? Are you more or less safe than someone who has never walked down that alley?

FEARSo what is fear really? Why do you fear when your just imagining stuff? Is fear real then?

I will be expanding on this over the coming day’s and at our weekly talk in the epic life group.

What limits us (fears), and how to focus on what benefits us.

Tuesday, Jul 12, 2016, 7:00 PM

Guinness Enterprise Centre
Taylor’s Lane Dublin 8, IE

5 epiclifers Attending

This is the power week. We get to see what is limiting us and let it go.By understanding who we really are we can then step into our role as a creator.Imagine waking up each morning with enthusiasm, how awesome would life be. what is the usual dialogue that goes on for you in the morning? does that empower you or dis-empower you?What would hap…

Check out this Meetup →

 

We are a global leader in developing innovative software, websites and marketing solutions for businesses. (1)

Self support the missing ingredient.

Constructive-Criticism Criticism is the most destructive thing that has ever been on this planet, and most of all from our parents. It causes a horrible chain reaction that can last for years, decades and multiple life times. We get criticized, this causes a feeling of not being good enough, then we want to feel better, we then look for approval. Our self-image has been damaged, we are not good enough anymore. Up until this time we were happy with everything we did. Then we learned to evaluate ourselves in a way that will diminish us, maybe for the rest of our lives.Self-Criticism

This has taken me hundreds of courses, a small fortune and thousands of hours of meditation and self evaluation. All roads lead to this, and this is the cause of all of our problems. Be it abuse or just criticism we are searching for something externally to fill this void in us. our low self esteem.

We have the feeling of not being good enough, we try to avoid that feeling, cover it up, or run away from it, it is constant no matter who we see or where we go, it is always with us. Because it happened so long ago, we can barely see, that it is this feeling that is causing soo much trouble in our lives. We are at its mercy.

We try to over achieve to counter act that feeling, maybe if I’m the best, richest or most popular maybe I can finally get rid of it. Maybe I’ll eventually be good enough maybe eventually I will be lovable? but we still manage to find that one thing that was not perfect, and no matter what achievements we have, they will never be good enough. We will never be good enough.

I can see how all addictions stem from avoiding this feeling, that will never cease or go away. I can see why guys and girls end up with the wrong people, hopelessly entangled in a hope to fill this void.

We are a global leader in developing innovative software, websites and marketing solutions for businesses. (1)What I learned about myself is that I was looking to fill this void, even after all the work I had put in. Deep down I was looking for support and approval from my parents. I didn’t get it as a child they had the best of intentions, but delivered it the way they were taught.

I’ve had a drive to be a better person, but it was coming from the wrong place. It was coming from a place of pain not joy.

I realized that this has had such huge impact on my life. Probably the most influential thing in my life.

I have heard so much about learning to love yourself. But what is that? Its vague at best and non-sense to most people. The vast majority of people do not know what love is and I certainly didn’t, to be honest I’m still not sure.

However, I do know what support is, I do know what being nice is, and I do know what seeing the best in others is. I know because I’ve been doing this for years for everyone else but myself.

Maybe I was subconsciously hoping that they would do it for me. But this could never happen my defenses where on such high alert, that even if they did give me a complement, I couldn’t hear or feel it. I had to solve this problem myself.

I had to see it / feel it.Self Support

What changed and over a few days is I started noticing how I had a lot of resistance to letting people know what I was up to, my latest plans, or just life in general, I wouldn’t share who I was, for fear of criticism, fear of being hurt. If no one knows how can they hurt me?

What I learned was I have to support myself, I have to be the one who pats myself on the back, and how I do that is by facing my feelings. Instead of running away I will listen to them and hear what they have to say. Ultimately they are there for a reason, and that reason is always for my highest good. They want me to stay safe, be happy ultimately they are looking out for me. They do not want me to feel pain. I don’t want me to feel pain.

freedom-is-lta-hrefquothttpearnscliffecoukhowwecanhelpreplicabagsukphpquotgtreplica-designer-handbag-13921121268n4kgWhat happened over the coming days, I paid attention to what is going on inside me, and finally listened to what my emotions where saying by listening I was able to turn around that approval mechanism, from being externally driven, to being internally driven. Essentially supporting myself.

I’ve tried this a number of times before by writing down what did over the course of a day but it was always avoiding the feeling rather than sitting with it and learning from it. I was trying to over ride it instead of listening to it.

I now have to create a new dialogue with myself feel my emotions, listen and build myself in the right way. Listening and feeling what is going on inside you is the quickest and easiest way of moving forward in life.

fresh-airYou have an opportunity right now to take a huge step forward in life. Where have you been looking for approval where have you been looking for support and at the same time ignoring yourself looking for something that you will never get externally? You have an opportunity to fill yourself with approval, support, and ultimately love yourself more.

Quite simply the hardest thing ever.

 

FreedomLet me ask you a question? What is freedom? We all want it, but what is it? Some people would say money is freedom, but what use is that when you work sixty or seventy hours a week? What use is that when you are sick?

What I’ve come to realize, is that freedom is options, but also the ability to choose. We all have options, but most people doubt themselves so much, that they can not make up their mind, or simply do not believe that they can do anything, so they can not see the options that are in front of them. Both these scenarios perfectly described me.

It has ta ken me a decade of solid work to eliminate the vast majority of these doubts. Because it took decades to put them there in the first place.

Silhouette of a child jumping cliff with sunset background

We live in a world where there is endless options, there are so many options that it is baffling. How can we build our ability to choose?

We decide, we decide to take full responsibility for our mind, and as a result everything else in our life.

When you have so many options, they all become a blur. It is impossible to make up your mind. So eventually you’re just going to have to say fuck it, and make a decision.

freedom-is-lta-hrefquothttpearnscliffecoukhowwecanhelpreplicabagsukphpquotgtreplica-designer-handbag-13921121268n4kgWhat is the opposite of doubting yourself? Its trust! self-trust, self-trust comes before self-belief. You have to take a leap of faith and say I am just going to do something and see what happens. Then figure out the rest. That is what taking responsibility looks like. Its saying one way or another I’m going to move forward. If I do some thing and it doesn’t work, then I’ll just try something else.

This is taking charge of your life it is literally figuring it out as you go along. School teaches us that we should know stuff beforehand, but it will never ever be that way. We always just figure it out as we go along.

Be crazySeeing this in every situation in my life has taken me years to unravel, but bit by bit day by day, I got there and I’m still learning this. It is just practice. but the more you practice the more you believe. The more you believe in yourself.

Let’s make this clear. The only way you will ever believe in yourself is if you take chances. You take a stand, say I am in charge, I am responsible for my life and my happiness.

imagesBut let’s make this as simple as possible. This all sound like a huge thing! But it’s not set yourself up to win. Today just do something different and see what happens. Pick one small thing and do it. By doing that one small thing you take charge in that moment and as a result you can see how you can take charge in every moment.

Then just practice.

Have an awesome time.

Miller.

 

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Connecting To Your Heart.

Over the past 6 months while I’ve been on this trip to speaking at Pendulum Summit I’ve been hit with a multitude of issues and whilst all of them have been a pain, they are good. They have focused me.

heart-462873The biggest thing I’ve learned (again) is that you have to do what you love. What I had to learn was how to get into my heart, actually connect with myself. Due to partying and the usual growing up traumas I cut myself off from my emotions. I was happy in my numb-ness, but this caused a huge problem I couldn’t connect with what I wanted. From the outside I was enthusiastic and trying new things, but each thing had no meaning, they were just interesting. When I decided to become a DJ, when I was 20 ish at a Fatboy slim concert, that was a huge emotional confirmation I WANT THIS nothing before, or since has had that effect on me. Everything was just so so. But DJing was a different story, I could be free.

Now after doing some serious soul searching and energetic clearing, I’ve been able to connect more and more with my heart, the mad thing is that connecting with your heart is so much harder, and easier than you could imagine.

heartbeat-163709If I look back at my life, well the last 16 years at least I kinda have been connected, but the context was all wrong. The only things that have interested me is mad things, like jumping out of planes, DJing to mad crowds, and just trying new things in general. I did not want a specific thing, “my heart’s desire”.

I always thought that my heart desire would be something like ending poverty. or feeding the homeless. But in reality what makes me excited, is strange, different, quirky, and mad things. new, new, different. I always thought that, that was just me, who I was, but that wasn’t what my heart’s desire was.

eyes-421781My heart’s desire is simply just “I like mad things” different, new, change.

I’ve come to realize that because my heart’s desire was so close, I could not see it. It is literally how I operated. It was literally what made me excited, enthusiastic, and curious. But what did I want to do with that. What could I do with that?

People are passionate about making money, they are passionate about blogging, making videos, entrepreneurship / business or some other thing. I was interested in these things, but my heart just wasn’t into it, so I just kept running out of steam, after the initial curiosity wore off.

So what does all this mean now? Well its changed things around for me. I don’t want things, I want experiences, that fill me full of enthusiasm, excitement, and feed my curiosity.fitness-540263

Understanding the feelings I wanted, helped me connect with what I wanted to do, to get them.

Our hearts desire is a feeling not a thing. This was a revelation to me. I wanted fun, as much fun as possible.

This enabled me to think about this whole thing another way. It enabled me to ask a better question!

landscape-640617I asked what will be the best way for me to get the most experiences, while having the most fun, and earning plenty of money. I came back around to blogging, but this time its blogging with a purpose, I want to have an epic life. I want to do it all. And I suspect you do too. But an awesome life for me, and for you are two different things. You may see an awesome life as having your own house and I see traveling as a much higher priority. But either way the process we go through will be the same.

I’ve come full circle on my goal for this year. I’m six months in, and I haven’t blogged in a month, because I got derailed. I got derailed because of one thing. I wasn’t connected to my heart, I did not have that, I ran out of steam, I could not see why I was doing this anymore. Because I wasn’t’ fully clear on what I wanted in the first place.

I want to do mad things and show the world that everything is possible. To do that, I want to speak at the premier speaking event in the whole country. Why because its mad and I feel it will have a positive impact on the people around me. Why because I’m nobody, and if a nobody can do this, well then pretty much anything is possible, if your heart is in it.glow-1177383

So let’s do some mad stuff, lets have lots of fun, and see what is possible. I’m re-energised and I hope you are too.